2020 has been a difficult year. Aside from staying indoors, I had a few tragic and sour moments that are fresh in my mind.
First off, our wedding had to be postponed because COVID knowledge was becoming clearer and clearer. It was not safe for us to bring our family together like that. Although disappointed, it seems like a small price to pay with the following events.
Mr. Lumberjack and I lost someone due to COVID. In the 6 years I have known him, he has a good place in my heart. He would visit the house with such a jovial attitude and greeted me with a special handshake. Always, without fail.
Then, we had four horrific incidents with my dog within 2 weeks and ultimately, we had to euthanize him. What he did was wrong and traumatizing, but I still love him and miss him very much. I wish he was able to cuddle me like old times.
In lieu of those things, it is hard to find the positive, especially when the negative is so prominent. However, it is important to try and find the good things you do have.
First, I am grateful for the good memories I have with our loved one and Loki, my dog. Loss can be soul consuming. I cry a lot, feeling an empty space in the room, but I would rather feel this than not know them at all. You honor their memory by holding their values and impact close to your heart.
Secondly, I am grateful for my family, the one I was born to and the one I married to. When Mr. Lumberjack was on a business trip, I was with them and they helped me with my Loki incident. My parents and brother were there for me. Mr. Lumberjack’s siblings dropped everything to help me. Otherwise, the event could have ended diferently with me alone and struggling.
Third, I am grateful we were able to purchase a home and make it special to us. I love having our family over to share in these special moments and to create new memories with Mr. Lumberjack.
Lastly, I am grateful for my job. We have taken a financial hit this year with all the medical bills. But I am very lucky to have a job during these times. On top of that, I have a boss and team that cares about me, which makes everything feel a lot better.
2020 took a turn for the worst. Here I was in 2019 looking at all the holidays lining up perfectly near weekends, and thinking this is going to be the best year ever. I am shaking my head. Don’t rely on me to be your fortune teller.
Through the bad parts, you come out stronger. I am more resilient, more positive and more loving. It can be hard nowadays, but I hope you also see some light on your end. It will be OK. You will make it. You are a survivor.